cutting great neck

february 5 2009

what makes today a good day:



1) i got a part in the play. and it's not such a tiny part either. it's about a 50-line part, so i'm super excited to play it--plus, i'm supposed to be BLACK [mr. gellert must have looked beyond my pallid qualities into my inner soul] which physically and spiritually brings me even closer to barack obama. also, donald--my character--is aleksandra's [I LOVE YOU] husband/boyfriend. and they're really crazy. and then during our first read-through i had so much fucking fun! mr. gellert made fun of my accent and everyone laughed though i didn't understand what was so funny because i don't have a strong accent and nobody even knows i have an israeli accent and i never tell them it's an israeli accent and whenever i do tell them they don't believe me. and i really like my character :)



2) today was my first layout/late night in the guide post. stayed until 9:05 p.m. so basically everyone really liked me and what i did with my page. it was incredible. indesign is so incredible, i love designing newspapers and i really hope that finally my newspaper design skills would be put to good use. i want to be editor-in-chief of the guide post later in life. yay.



3) i understood the math for my math test tomorrow. oh shit. i need to be studying and NOT doing this!

and that's probably it.



~~~


had a hard time falling asleep for the past few days. i'm lying in bed. thinking about life. mmm. and i try to fall asleep, but can't. took long, long nap yesterday afternoon. i guess, sleep is not really an escape for me, it's more of a -- more of a well-controlled and troubling addiction. i hate trying to fall asleep. for the past few months i've been able to just pop right onto my pillow and doze off the second my ear touched the satin. so i'm really uncertain about what had happened to me over the past week.


i have also had the weirdest dreams. last night... i don't remember the dream from last night, though i do remember the dream from the night before. somehow israeli uncle & aunt & cousins came to visit us ... and our house was weird. well, for one thing, i went to pee into a bathroom in a room which exists in the house i live in right now but there were two toilets, both of them marvel, one of them for pee and one of them for poop. and i subconciously knew this. no idea how. and there was this huge bathtum behind the toilets. the dining room was weird too. and it was... i don't remember so well.

and the night before that, i dreamed that all of gilboa came to visit me in ny. it was so bizarre because i never give so much thought to gilboa, well not enough to have an entire gilboa-oriented fantasy anyway, but i clearly remember seeing dannielle and katya there and it was in the dark and it was cold and everyone was embracing each other and i remember seeing danielle and katya from far away and screaming their names as if we just saw each other again after a lifetime. and there were more people there too. i vaguely recall seeing faces illuminated by fire that had nothing to do with california or gilboa. people from my current life. who, i don't remember, but i remember thinking about it when i woke up.


~~


from now on my afternoons will be basically filled. oh shit. and with school and all. oh shit. i've still got some hw. oh oh ohhh shit.



exactly a year ago was super tuesday. it seems like time has flown by. hillary clinton--i still miss her infintiely, but am somewhat joyous that things turn out the way they are.

here's my picture post taken on a warm san diego winter night from super tuesday 2008, when california chose clinton by a 8% margin. i love democrats.