cutting great neck

this is such a horrid month. a stressful, long, agonizing month.


may.



ap, regents prep, homework up, fun down, i die.

i want feedback. is this being read, or is this just for my personal gain?


ap world in a week (may 20).
i'm (almost!) excited.

To my yellow dog:

Your lids close like lips
that summon sluggish words
with their last breath,
a night closing in on itself
like lips on a ball
of unraveling yarn.
Night has been your shelter,
my slumber—your guardian;
the wicked witch
has whipped you away,
you dying, yellow dog
with a head attached by
two thin yellow strings.
Diamond eyes and golden crust
that cooled against my cheek
evenings and summer afternoons,
under thick blankets, false hopes
that disappeared with daunting
dreams and jaunting ambitions—
night prowling in black,
plastic eyes, wind flapping
in long, detached ears. My yellow dog: Ten years,
you have brought me night;
Ten years, you have brought
me sleep. You aged Thai yellow
doll—your last barks ring
around my head in dreams.

27/01/09

so let me start off from sunday.



sunday, we went to the lower east side with avi, judy, yahli; tenement museum, jewish market, delancey street. the tenement museum was so inspiring, so miserable too--giving us a glimpse of 7000+ people's lives, many of them immigrants, like moi. we couldn't talk pictures. oh well.

then we crossed delancey street



sped through the lower east side



and went straight into katz's delicatessen--i've been waiting since november 2007 to go there, when my parents promised me that we'll go the next time we visit nyc [little did we know that we would be living next to nyc by the next year. grr.]



had a delicious pastrami sandwich.



so yesterday i went to school--short periods. and then i asked jessica fogel about cat power cause she said she might go to the concert with me and so she rolled her eyes and said, "gadi, leave me alone? we have a midterm today!"

blink.

blink.

oh shit.

anyway, studied all day yesterday only to discover at 12:30 one of the easiest chem tests i have ever taken in my life.

yay!

and today i woke up at 9:26 after having the weirdest dreams ever. i dreamed that i was with a lot of friends on a big hill overlooking a quaint european/latin american/asian village which looked more like uniformly colorful legos than an actual metropolis. anyhow, i woke up when a big angry golden retriever cornered me to a wall with its big teeth.

and in an hour i'll be in school preparing for a history test.

it's 11:16 am over here and i'm getting tired.

ahhh.


poem for english class:

My Black Muse
another night peels from my eyes
like piano keys sliding off against
each other. a match burns from two
different sides; an old, dying wolf
wrings his tongue from the roof of
his jaw, and howls; a poetry book,
frayed, splintered, slides off a pile
of white papers. my table, fixed to
the wall, creaks. it’s ten p.m. before
my math midterm and i’m outside taking
pictures of the snow. black, señor night
winnows out the white lights in rows, slips on
his navy-striped cloak; i return home, my
fingers burning from the cold, burning
from the sudden heat of habitat, from
pressing the push button for too long.